He redeemed me. He made me feel alive and real. He saved me from The Evil Machines. He is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. He gave me the bestest and happiest two days of my life. He helped me to understand what I am. He taught me that I was not alone. He was My Reason and My Plan and will always be. As opposed to me, he was fucking strong. He was a real fighter. He wanted to live. He changed my world. He made it better, more colorful. He stared at me in a way nobody has. He had big bright brown eyes. I felt as if he just understood me and trusted me with no effort. He liked my voice and my songs. We were true friends. I was supposed to show him how things were outside, how The Game went, that was my self-appointed mission, but we did not have time for that. He sucked the tip of my nose, though. He also touched the scarce beard I grew for him to play with. Alas, I could not teach him how to make a banana shake. We tried to escape from the hospital together to see the world but the security alarm went off at the elevator and we were captured and sent back to the room. We stood by the window at the hospital and I showed him the woods and the sky. I told him that one day I would take him up there, to the stars. I just had to love him. I felt a primal urge to love him. He was hermoso. Now I have too much love within me and my little superhero, the source and natural target of all that love, is gone. He was my joy and this is my sadness. This is Sadness and Pain. I would have done anything for him. I would have given away my own life. Twice. He will not be remembered because there is not need to remember: he is still with us. He will never leave us. He is in the air (“in between molecules of oxigen and carbon dioxide”). He is everything that is beautiful and good. And the universe is full of beauty, goodness and wonder; he was a living proof of that. Therefore, he surrounds us. He is right here. He covers us. We have to give love and value life, that was his lesson to me. He will take good care of all of us. He made that promise to his amazing mother before he took off. He will hold to that promise, I am sure. He was made of everlasting Happiness and Love.
We loved him and will continue to love him forevermore.
Con lo lejos que me encuentro y se que esta aca, el pequeño y fuerte Mauricio. Esta en todo lado. Es lindo, de verdad. Lo siento tan cerca y sonrio. Es hermoso.
Es hermoso, Javier, hermoso.
Cuanta tristeza, y a la vez, que belleza lo que escribiste. Que increible tu experiencia de amor puro con tu hijo.
He was definitely a superhero, no doubt about that.
The fact that he came to show you that is a beautiful thing. although to acknowledge that and decide to stay true to that love is even more beautiful and wonderful. I hope that love fulfill you and your wife and surround you with peace.
Tu hijo es hermoso. Y vos sos muy fuerte y valiente. Dios lo cuida, te lo prometo. Un abrazo fuerte, desde lejos.
[And yet, today I feel unbearably sad.]
With a closing of my eyes, a bit of my heart goes to you in this moment, Javier and Mónica. Love *will* go on — if anything, that’s what remains, after everything else is gone: love, distilled and pure. To give love and value life: this is what is.
With a telepathic hug from Bogotá.
No te conzco, pero desde q te sigo tus escritos me Han llenado de mil cosas. Sobre este ultimo solo queria decir gracias, es realmente hermoso en especial sin UNO es padre.
I don’t know you, I just wish I could hug you. You are right in your sadness…give yourself time, a lot of time. Music may not ease the pain, but it will keep you company, and maybe it’ll help you a little…and now a little is a lot.
From me to you and your wife, but specially for your baby boy, this song: I’ll See You In My Dreams…
http://www.mojvideo.com/video-joe-brown-i-ll-see-you-in-my-dreams-2002/61396c3aacf97a4bf32a
The prettiest star.
Él es hermoso. absolutamente hermoso. Con mi corazón allá, con ustedes. Puro amor, amor puro, esto es lo que queda, lo que permanece, lo que hay.
Con ustedes dos, allá, así estoy. Abrazándolos con fuerza desde lejos.
Bellísimo lo que escribiste. Gracias, Javier por compartirlo con nosotros. Mucha fuerza para vos y tu compañera. Mauricio es hermoso. Hermoso.
Hermoso lo que escribiste en este mar de tristeza. Manténganse fuertes.
Es lo más conmovedor que jamás haya leído, el es un súper héroe.
Sus palabras reflejan muchos sentimientos que he tenido con mi hija y no los habia podido expresar. Sin embargo, mi hija sigue aca conmigo y Mauricio no esta con usted. Life is so fucking unfair. Mauricio es tambien mi superheroe.
Sometimes there will be words, beautiful words like the ones you’ve written above, and other times there will be no words. For me, I sadly have no words at all this time. We are thinking of you.
Also no words. Also hugs. The world is full of people sending even more love your way, so that the air is thick with is all around you and your family.
I don´t know what to say except that your love and grief have come to this town and touch this soul.
May the force be with you and your wife. i know It is already.
lo que pasó me ha afectado como pocas cosas en la vida. un abrazo.
no words. just feelings.
Hermoso texto. Quien diria que el dolor provoca belleza, se por experiencia que la gente no se va, se queda, que el dolor y la alegria, el coraje y el amor, la nostalgia y la impotencia y miles de sentimientos mas se quedan con nosotros para toda nuestra vida. Quisiera decirte que el tiempo lo cura todo, pero no. El alma es fuerte, pero retiene los golpes, quiza dejen de doler un poco pero siempre estaran ahi. Lo unico que nos queda es regocijarnos en la dicha de los momentos que tuvimos. De lo que fué. Siempre es mejor un instante de dicha a nada. Siempre es mejor haber tenido poco que nada, porque el que nada tuvo nada extraña y los recuerdos de alguien querido son invaluables. No se si estoy escribiendo puras cosas sin sentido, las lágrimas me traicionan. No los conozco, pero siento su dolor y lo comparto. Empatizo ante su situacion, y este texto, sobre todo me conmueve. Es hermoso, es tieno y fuerte, es doloroso y lleno de amor y de dicha. Como lo dije no te conozco, pero te admiro. Animo. Mucho animo.